We all have certain triggers that tend lower our self -esteem once in a while. These triggers could come from seeing someone you feel is doing better than you or people that seem to have it all going well for them in certain or every area of life.
We all know that gut wrenching feeling that arises when we begin to second-guess our personality, skills, gifts and talents just by feeling that every other person is better off than we are and unfortunately, social media on all platforms is one that quickly triggers such feelings of disdain.
Social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn and the rest in certain or most instances leave us comparing ourselves internally or externally with people on these platforms that we either know or do not know, people we have met or never met and perceive to be better than we are.
A sneak-peak into certain people's profile can leave you wondering and questioning your existence, appearance and accomplishments without realizing how far you have come and the best you have done to get to where you are right now.
I have fallen into this trap too several times until I realized whether what is portrayed on social media platforms is true or not, we all have our journeys. We are all to arrive at different destinations designed for us by God. We are all not going the same place in life and we all have our time at reaching where we ought to be.
God never created us the same and did not give us same purposes in life and at such our life's experiences and stories are uniquely different from every other person's.
That is why it is not wise to compare yourself with anyone irrespective of the person's glamorous looks or accomplishments. The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 10:12 "For we dare not class or compare ourselves with those who commend themselves. But they, measuring themselves, and comparing themselves, are not wise."
It is foolishness to compare yourself - worth, ability, skills, talents, vision or dreams - with someone else.
Instead of comparing yourself with people you think are doing better, see them as a source of inspiration and motivation to reach your desired goal in life.
Sometimes, you don't even know what these people are going through behind the scenes and beyond what you see displayed on social media.
Comparison can make you want to leave your race and run another person's race, it can make you abandon your dreams and begin to pursue someone else's dreams and it can make you forget how uniquely beautiful and talented you are that you may want to begin living someone else's life.
Some of these people have genuinely been and gone through a lot to get to where they are today and are proud of their accomplishments despite all the ups and downs experienced so before you think of wishing you are what they are, be where they are or have what they have, would you also want to wish you had gone through what they had gone through to be where they are?
The reality is that, people only showcase the best aspects of their lives on social media and will never showcase their worst days. Reality is often lost on social media and our best versions displayed.
Everyone you see on social media is fighting a battle unknown to you that pictures and places displayed will not show to you or ever tell you.
Scrolling down people's feeds or timelines can create in you feelings of lack and want, dissatisfaction, depression and anxiety when you begin to compare yourself with them and what you do at this time is comparing your true reality with their idealized perfect lives.
To stop comparing your life with that of your counterparts on social media;
- Redirect your focus on your dreams and goals and stay true to your purpose. I have come to realize that when people deviate from their true calling, they begin to lose relevance even in their own craft. Stay true to your dreams, vision, purpose and pursue them passionately then allow God take you through the process. He never abandons his own and at the right time he will bring you to your preferred destination. He said in Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you ,"declares the LORD." plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." You miss God's best for your life when you begin to compare yourself with others or try living their lives.
- Learn to control your time on all social media platforms. Nothing wrong if you go through it like 5-10 mins a day but becomes so bad and addictive when you spend your all day on social media perusing through timelines and gossips. If you have nothing worthwhile to do on social media other than going through profiles of people that will trigger feelings of inadequacy in you, use the time to work on yourself. You can use such times to learn new skills online, read eBooks or hard copies, study great people to learn about their failure and success stories.
- Always remind yourself that not all that glitters is gold. Social media is not always accurate. It is not always as it seems. Your life may be more beautiful or as beautiful as the one you are trying to compare yourself with. People only show a snippet of a moment and not a full flashed reality. You have a beautiful life and you live your reality. Be proud of it.
- Let those you follow be a source of inspiration and motivation for you to live your best life and actualize your dreams. Be intentional and deliberate about who you follow and let your followers draw inspiration from you too to live their best lives. Life is a two-way street.
The worst kind of life you can live is living a life of comparisons that makes you unaware of how beautiful you are, how far you have come in life and of the beautiful things you have and have accomplished so far in life but rather makes you aware of your inadequacies and lacks.
No one has it all and no one lives a perfect life. We all strive to live better lives. We are perfect in our imperfections so be proud of who you are, where you and what you have while you work towards actualizing your goals, dreams and arriving at your desired destination.
Quote for the day - "The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone's highlight reel." - Steve Furtick
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